Finding a “home” in your home
BY ZENA YARDE
As a counseling psychologist I have always envied people who were able to work from home. The words “Be careful what you wish for” rung true as it became a reality in 2020. These tough times can strain our resources as we take stock of our personal and collective responsibilities. As a human being I am going through the same crisis as you are and I too am trying to hold space for myself as well.
As professionals we realize our responsibilities towards our communities and our family. Finding the balance in meeting the needs of the self and the other can be empowering and enjoyable when we treat our successes and failures as part of the learning process to master the game. It all is a matter of perspective.
So we ask ourselves, “How do we adapt to this transition”, “What will fit into this new normal?” How do we make meaning of this event in our lives and the world?
Below, I attempt to highlight some insights and experiences of being a counselor and a human being, navigating this pandemic.
Working from home:
Our profession requires a space where focused attention can be provided to the individual. This can be difficult for counsellors living in noisy environments, and even as we cope with these obstacles one misses the in-person exchange. We have also found ourselves balancing household requirements and tending to the ever present needs of loved ones along with managing a full schedule of work and self-care. Activities like cooking and cleaning that are inherently therapeutic also tax our capacities, the challenge here is to find the ways and means to retain the therapeutic quality of activities and draw appropriate boundaries over the time one spends multitasking.
Taking breaks, cutting one-self some slack, reaching out to other professionals and maybe rewarding oneself at the end of the day could also help us retain the enjoyment for what we do.
Online Counseling:
Counselors are trained to observe body language and also communicate presence for which face-to-face communication is ideal. Online sessions take adjusting to, as we seek to broaden communication to fit the situation. However we can sometimes be left feeling helpless when we need to communicate our presence towards a client who is experiencing an extreme emotional response over a life event. We are reminded of the importance of silence and physical presence as we make do with our router and try our best to reach out through the laptop screen or through our phones. Let’s face it this is a long distance client counselor relationship now! We add finesse in our vocabulary to communicate what we would do non-verbally
Self-care:
Along with supporting clients we may also feel the need to support our own family and friends as they deal with their struggles during this time. We also see the importance of supporting our own needs.
One of the challenges in self-care lies in accepting that there are limitations to the amount of work one can do given the current conditions. Sometimes we want to do more, but we have to accept that like our clients we are also journeying through this new and uncertain situation and have to deal with our own fears and thoughts regarding it.
This can be an opportunity to practice self-care and create holding space for one’s own needs while finding ways and means to reach out and work where one is required. It also helps us see how the effects of self-care and a feeling of well-being extend beyond the individual and are reflected in our family and social environments.
Resources:
India is a country where the mental health profession is still developing with ground-level initiatives taken by individuals to support the community. There is a shortage of resources for the Indian population with regards to the number of Mental Health workers, information, support in regional languages and awareness of mental health. To support the population better, what also requires strengthening is the sense of support within the mental health community. Activities like supervision, online workshops, skill building and emotion support groups work well towards this end. Such initiatives have taken birth and are integral towards tackling the mental health crisis that we need to gear ourselves towards.
The opening up of the economy, our safety and the sense of normalcy depends on the course of this disease. For now it is something that has overwhelmed us from the outside. Amongst other things it is driving home the interconnectedness between the individual and society. We need to take collective responsibility of the impact of this crisis on the mental health of the entire population. Like the current pressure on hospital services, if left unchecked over a period of time there maybe pressure on the services that mental health professionals can provide. We not only need to work on the people who come to us but also reach out to those who can’t. Communities can be prepared to be sensitive towards the mental health needs of its members through increased awareness about mental health.
Social media can be used effectively keeping in mind target populations and the attention span of individuals. Infographics and short videos in regional languages could broaden outreach and account for diverse linguistic groups. On the ground, naturally formed groups such as religious organizations, housing societies, cultural communities lend themselves to easy access within the geographical areas we inhabit. Lay people could be empowered to identify, inform and refer individuals for help. NGOs such as Sangath, The Minds foundation and Manas Foundation to name a few are doing inspiring work within communities on a large scale. We can contribute towards this within our own means.
Covid -19 has helped us see our interconnectedness. If we can be diseased together we can also heal in the same way together and maybe extend our definition of “home” to the community.